Mistakes undone

Do you hear my heart beating?
I think it's all rasped and painful.
Words people used to makes me smile lingers and crushes me.
I'm not angry, tired or engrossed but suffocated.
Work doesn't help much either.
All I know is that my emotions are on random.
It's like on iPod and always stuck on shuffle.
I think my brain has taken over.
It chants words into my head which lead to destructive behaviour.
People don't get me cos I've an everlasting charade acting out in their eyes.
Would anyone accept me for who I really am?
It's really not the fear that haunts me most.
It's the hurt.

♥Lies that grabs at me.